her royal highness.

Thursday, June 30, 2011

unexpected.

it kind of scares me that people still read my blog, especially since blogger started having this section called stats, where you'll be able to find out where people are linking to your site from. and mostly in this case it's twitter and facebook.

currently at home wasting my life away. i've been on MC for 2 days! so i get to miss one entire day of ATBMS and 2 hours of jap. don't really like the fact that i'm missing jap, but oh well. i've not been doing my homework at all, and i've already missed two and a half days of school. not that i really bother. i feel like at this moment, my life cannot get anymore horrible as it is.

i wish the same old problems i've been facing for the past 11 years of my life would stop coming back to haunt me over and over again. i don't like the fact that i'm easily judged and whenever i try to defend myself, others just tell me it's all excuses coming from me.

okay...scrap that. i should be here on earth to live my life to the fullest for God, and no one else. i should stay strong, and be myself, the best that i can be. i'm not going to settle for second best when Daddy already sent down His Son to die for me so that i can be the best in the world. i'll keep fighting for what i love and who i love. nothing else matters but that.

JIAYOU GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you can be your own encouragement, even if there's no one to boost you up(:

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 3:33 PM

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

judgement.

somehow life just give you a pail full of lemons. no matter what you try to do to them, the best you can do is to make lemonade. right now, i'm trying my best to walk in His word, to live a victorious life, but no matter how i try, the same old insults and ridicule that i've been facing for my whole life keeps coming back.

i feel like i'm trapped in a vicious cycle. and no one but Him can pull me away from it. i miss having a place to call home. i miss having a bunch of people that i can really call my friends. i miss having a guy to love and give my whole heart to. and i miss God's love, and His strength and grace. i miss the old me. the happy-go-lucky me. whatever happened to young and innocent? how is throwing insults directly to a person's face a joke?

why do i bother putting up with this time and time again. i keep telling myself that you're not worth my love. but He's up there telling me that i should show you His love. i need to be strong and tap into His strength.

i have superpowers you might not understand. but i'm strong enough to overcome this, and i KNOW that i can make things right again through Him.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 12:39 AM

Sunday, June 26, 2011

yetagain.

don;t know how many buckets of tears i've shed over the past few days. how do explain to anyone the feeling of being treated like nothing? the feel of having no friends? the feeling of wanting to find out what's wrong and changing, so that i can become a better person?

if there's anything wrong, can you just tell me straight in my face? instead of making me feel so bloody miserable and hurt that's i'm trying to fix the situation, but you guys think that it's more fun to hurt me like this.

falling back into my hole once again. now i really don't know how to get out of it.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 12:12 AM

Sunday, June 12, 2011

complications.

i wish you would stop lying to me and to yourself. you know you can't let go, and you know you can't forget. so why do you keep telling me so? i wish that you'll stop complicating our friendship. it's already complicated as it is.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 10:03 PM

Friday, June 10, 2011

death.

silly girl, even if you really were to die next year, you still have one year to set your life right. i know predicting your own death through a dream scares you beyond anything in the world, even worse than when he said goodbye and broke things off, you still need to be strong.

you have your life to live now. the 365 days countdown starts now.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 3:56 AM