her royal highness.

Friday, June 29, 2012

risinganger.

i'm damn freaking tired today, but people won't stop asking me questions. and i'm damn annoyed and a little upset about the whole freaking daum. i just want to curl up and cry now can?

i want to punch someone tonight. and i want to talk to someone tonight. but there's no one for me to talk to. i miss having someone i can bare my soul to. i can't even do that with kor cause he'll just freak and run away. like all of my brothers do.

i'm just gonna go now. having a fever and gastric flu is not helping. it's been a week and i've not even recovered, i'm out of medicine, and i don't want to spend more money going to the doctor's just to get more. money is so tight right now. even though i'm earning my own money, i really don't want to spend it cause it's supposed to be for college, and i already spent so much of my last year's earning from Stardust, and now i'm running 2 shops to double my profits, but i feel like i'm losing money instead of earning. even though my accounting books is reflecting my earnings, but bank account isn't. sighs. i'm tired of this.

i'm hungry, but i don't wanna eat cause my tummy will just flare up at me again. i should just go sleep, but today seems to be customer's enquiry day. ughhhh...

please just let this day end now! having FYP in the micro lab is just killing my health all over again. i think i'll only recover from this gastric flu in October. no milk for me for 4 more months. well done!

seems like i can finally go sleep. goodnight!

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 11:58 PM

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

finality.

hello creepy people. don't google my name and stalk my blog please. so creepy! aiyoh! want to stalk at least say hi kay?

and you! last warning okay. don't treat my kor like he's your dog on a leash restricting him and everything. he's a human too, just in case you forgot, who needs friends and confidantes. if you're acting like this, i see why he hide things from you. continue doing so, and you'll end up with no one. trust me, i've been through it.

on a side note! yay! BtoB's Diary cuts are the cutest! i'm really glad of those days when i started to take note of minhyuk during inkigayo when they were still promoting for insane! and now BtoB is my ultimate! <3 비투비 사랑해요!

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 10:39 PM

Monday, June 25, 2012

cycles.

Here we go again. You acting like a kid. And you wonder why I dislike you sometimes. Why I never agreed to what you proposed in the first place. BITCH PLEASE. Whatever makes you happy really. I don't have the time and energy to compete and play games with you. I'll no longer treat you the way I used to. You've been replaced by so many others better than you. More care, less selfish. You were supposed to be older, more understanding. Whatever okay.

Talk to the hand.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 6:21 PM

Saturday, June 23, 2012

hello&goodbye.

must i make everything you say to me a promise so you won't forget? i feel like i've been forgotten. how pathetic that feels, you probably won't ever understand will you? i wonder who i am to you a lot. i doubt the authencity of your words. and of your actions. prove to me that you're worth me spending time and effort with.

i sometimes regret getting close to you when you treat me just like a tool. i'm just here for you to use aren't i? honestly, i don't need a person like you in my life. the way i see it, you need me more than i need you, and you owe me way more than what i owe you. fine, which ever way you want to act. i've had enough of you. your constant complains and everything. whatever really. like i said, i don't need you. you're not trust worthy.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 1:32 AM

Monday, June 18, 2012

accomplishment.

I feel so accomplished today! 9 bracelets in 9 hours! Including break times and meal times. HAHA! I think I did quite well really! If I just focused on doing them bracelets without anydistractions, I could most probably do them in 30-45mins from scratch? (: Only reason why I can't do them faster is because I'm such a perfectionist at times. So boo me. Whatever. I'm earning money for college. That's the most important thing. But my fangirling is spending half of that money -.- I've actually lost track of how much I've earned, because I keep changing the price of my bracelets, and because the currnecy exchange rates fluactuates too much, so it's really hard to keep track. But no matter, as long as there's a steady increase of money in my account, it's good enough for me, to survive one month on my own.

I'm on tenderhooks right now, but I'll just let things play out. I know that everything will work out in the end(:

Contemplating going out tomorrow or not. Seeing that I didn't get a reply regarding someone I was supposed to meet tomorrow, or in fact later on in the day, I have a feeling I'll be spending my time at home working on my bracelets and settling batch #7 orders for tomorrow, to be sent out Tuesday. Oh why do I have to have FYP this week? Can't I catch a break? I was really looking forward to this holiday break to relax actually. Oh well...

Last words before I go...오빠!너무보고싶어요! ㅜㅜ

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 3:00 AM

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

subtlility.

If you have something to say, just say it. Don't go beating around a non-existent bush. I don't like it when one moment, you're acting all comfortable, and the next it's like you don't even care, and you're unreachable. Whatever really, I'm just saying, act one way and stick to it. Don't play games with me, not that you'll win or anything.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 11:09 PM

Sunday, June 03, 2012

reminders.

Remind me why I'm putting myself through this emotional turmoil again? It's not healthy, but I can't help it. Sorry if you think I'm messing up your life, but seriously, if you can't trust even yourself or even have confidence about such a situation, you're going to find out and learn the hard way, just like I did.

I used to think of just that one, the first for everything. How naive and stupid of me now that I see it. I learnt so much from just the first. And all I can think now of it was the bad memories. There wasn't even any good memories that I remember. Sure there was that few, but what's there to learn from good memories? They're shoved at the back of my mind now. You learn from the worst, and sometimes I'm thankful that I made the worst mistake in my first, so I learn not to make them again in my next and hopefully my last. But I won't be so naive again. I maybe be 3, but you bet I'm way more mature than that. And people will testify for it. Just cause I don't show you my other side does not mean you can actually take advantage of it. Be warned really. And I have warned you.

To the people who think I'm gone forever. Yes, I'm leaving. But just you. Not anything else. Sometimes I honest feel that you guys are the people who make me more miserable than that one guy. You talk about family, but the differential treatment, the biasness. You make me feel sick with your hypocrisy. You keep telling me I don't try hard enough. News flash, I've been trying for 4 years. I'm sick of trying. And when I do actually try, I get shot in the foot and in the heart. That you actually call me an AS. Well, whatever makes you happy really. Whatever makes you feel good about yourself for not trying as hard as I did.

I don't regret any of the things that I did. I just regret those things that I had to go through which were out of my control. I learn from everything. Maybe I get bitten twice, but I learn still.

I like that I'm self-sufficient. I know that I am. I run 2 shops, I try my hardest. I may quit sometimes, but at least I had the guts to try out. I lead my life the way I know I'm supposed to. I walk in His Light, I may fall out of that light too, but I always go back, and I'll continue on that straight path.

mabTHONG.
lollipop princess! <3

my fantasy world. ♥ 12:23 AM